Bean Poisoning!

Twice! Twice now I have gone to the grocery store to find that they were completely out of canned white beans. Is there an international shortage I should be aware of? Did all the white bean growers/canners have their businesses foreclosed on? What is going on? I wouldn't have been so upset if white beans weren't such a staple food at my table. I use them in so many dishes. My new favorite thing to do with them is make White Bean Sage Ravioli. Instead of reaching for the far inferior lima beans the grocery store would have me buy as a disgusting substitute, I decided to take on one of my greatest fears. I was going to make my beans the old fashioned way- starting from dried. My heart was racing. I looked side to side in the canned vegetable isle flicking my head as I finally and dramatically fixed my sights on an over head security camera. I narrowed my eyes and thought, "If you can hear me S&W bean company, that's right. I've decided to step outside your tin box." I marched over two isles to the bulk foods section and dispensed bin #614's organic navy bean contents at only $1.29/lb. With beans in bag I went home to do some research. Years ago my brother gave me The Joy of Vegetarian Cooking for my birthday. To be honest, I rarely use this book as it is completely cheese-centric, but I remembered that it had a whole section devoted to cooking beans. In my youth I would scoff at these pages thinking, "Yeah right. Like there will ever be a time I won't be able to find white beans flooding from the store shelves." How naive I was... What the book told me is that beans are not in a hurry to be cooked. First I would have to soak the beans in water overnight. This method seemed outlandishly over cautious. What food worth eating takes this long to prepare? Certainly nothing I wanted to make would require this level of comittment. I decided to consult the internet. What I found will horrify you! If ever there was a true Halloween tale of kitchen terror it was this. According to the FDA there is a serious illness known as Bean Poisoning. Stop laughing; this is true! This is the secret that keeps us all addicted to the canned varieties. Without proper education we could poison ourselves! What!? Okay, enough fear mongering. There is a sure fire way to avoid Bean Poisoning. Believe it or not it starts with soaking your beans over night to leach out some of the toxic phytohemagglutinin. I would have to be patient. Secondly you must cook your beans until they have reached an internal temperature greater than 176 degrees F. If you fail to heat them past this point, and this no joke, the toxin becomes more potent! So, armed with this knowledge I soaked my beans last night and boiled them this morning-vigorously for 15 mins and then allowed them to simmer until they were soft. I might have over cooked them a little bit but they tasted great. I ate 5 beans and am currently waiting to see if I show any signs of Bean Poisoning before I test them out on Justice. We'll know in 3-5 hours as there is a 100% rate of illness. That's just the kind of mad scientist I am. If you succeed in making your own beans without spending a day on the toilet, you can make my ravioli. Isn't that a risk you are willing to take?

White Bean Sage Ravioli

1 cup cooked white beans
2 tbsp. dried sage
1 tsp. garlic salt
2 tbsp. lemon juice
1/2 cup sauted white onion
1 cup cooked spinach
olive oil as needed

Sheets of uncooked ravioli pasta.

Place all ingredients in a food processor except the oil. Turn the machine on and add the olive oil until a paste forms. Place teaspoon sized drops onto the ravioli sheets and fold them over to form little pouches. Seal them and cut them out. Boil in a large pot of salted water for 3-5 mins. Drain and serve with marinara sauce.

Happy Halloween!!!